Rational Cooking

It’s a warm night for January here in the Springs.  The moon is in the West, still above the mountains at this hour.  My upstairs neighbor is stirring, and I am debating whether I should deep fry some peanut butter and chocolate, or just eat them raw in the trendy Californian manner.

One never quite knows what to do when it comes to the incomprehensible art of cookery.  As a rational person, I am instinctively inclined to deep frying vegetables, such as peanut butter and chocolate, because I have heard the process destroys bacteria and is thus more hygienic.  The Californians, however, are said to eat their vegetables raw, and it is well known to me that California is over populated — surely not many of them can be dying of food poisoning.  Consequently, there seems to be an equal weight of reason for eating either deep fried or raw peanut butter and chocolate, and I am therefore at a loss to decide which is the better method.

Why, I wonder, must cookery be such a perplexing art?

10 thoughts on “Rational Cooking”

  1. That would be a delightful, fried treat. If I’m ever in the neighborhood….

    I like to eat at the night market. Colleagues say it’s dirty, but everything is deep fried. No bacteria can live through that.


  2. Peanut butter is one of the healthiest fats in the planet, so fry the veggies. As a mark of respect to the Califonicators, stir-fry them.
    As for the chocolate, add some ice cream or some cake/brownie and dunk it on top. You need the fat to protect yourself from the cold, dude! And if you are worm warm you attract women, didn’t ya know that?


  3. Hmm. I wonder if Spock ever wrote a cookbook, would it look like this?

    Could you imagine him doing a cooking show? Standing there in an apron, holding a spatula, saying something like, “Overdoing the black pepper would not be logical”?

    Considering the recent news of a peanut butter recall, my dear, I do believe deep frying it is absolutely the most rational thing to do.


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