It’s a warm night for January here in the Springs. The moon is in the West, still above the mountains at this hour. My upstairs neighbor is stirring, and I am debating whether I should deep fry some peanut butter and chocolate, or just eat them raw in the trendy Californian manner.
One never quite knows what to do when it comes to the incomprehensible art of cookery. As a rational person, I am instinctively inclined to deep frying vegetables, such as peanut butter and chocolate, because I have heard the process destroys bacteria and is thus more hygienic. The Californians, however, are said to eat their vegetables raw, and it is well known to me that California is over populated — surely not many of them can be dying of food poisoning. Consequently, there seems to be an equal weight of reason for eating either deep fried or raw peanut butter and chocolate, and I am therefore at a loss to decide which is the better method.
Why, I wonder, must cookery be such a perplexing art?