Advice, Culture, Emotions, Happiness, Human Nature, Life, Living, Love, Lovers, Passion, Poetry, Relationships

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel: The World Only Wants You to Feel Good

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel

“Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.” ― Oscar Wilde

(About a 3 minute read)

Nine of every twelve truths
The world tells you about love are false.

The world is not trying to harm you,
That’s not the problem.

The world is only trying to make you feel good.

The world tells you love is cute.
It only wants you to feel good.

The world tells you love is soft.
It only wants you to feel good.

The world tells you love has no thorns.
It only wants you to feel good.

The world tells you how to love.
It only wants you to feel good.

The world points your feet down a road.
It tells you down that road you’ll find love.
It only wants you to feel good.

The world tells you to look at your feelings.
It only wants you to feel good.

The world tells you to look at what she means to you.
It only wants you to feel good.

The world tells you to look at what he means to you.
It only wants you to feel good.

My friend, if you want to love someone,
Look away from the smoke and to the fire.
Look away from how you feel and look at them.
Look away from what they mean and look at them.

Forget how you feel. Your feelings will be there anyway.
Treat your feelings like a hardy weed you don’t need to garden.
Focus on your feelings when you want to navel-gaze.
But don’t focus on your feelings and call it love.
That’s like calling the smoke the fire.
Don’t call that love, don’t fool yourself.

You tell her she’s the one.
But you treat her just like you treat one hundred other women.

You tell him he’s the one.
But you treat him just like you treat one hundred other men.

Who have you been looking at?

The world tells you to look at you.
Do you really think that helps you better see your beloved?

I see the sparrow singing in the hedge.
Do I see it any better by looking at my feelings?
I see the sparrow singing in the hedge.
Do I see it any better by looking at what it means to me?
I see the sparrow singing in the hedge.
Do I see it any better by looking at me?

People so often close their hearts
Just when they think they have learned to open them.
The world tells them which way to swing the door.
The world only wants them to feel good.

If you really want to love someone,
If you really care to love,
Don’t rest your gaze upon your navel,
Turn your gaze to them instead.

You can know everything there is to know
About your feelings.

You can know everything there is to know
About what someone means to you.

You can know all of that, and even more,
Without knowing a thing about the one you love.

You can know all of that, and even more,
While you’re leaving your beloved
And heading off down the road.

Art, Authenticity, Being True To Yourself, Community, Courage, Death, Dying, Hate, Honesty, Human Nature, Humor, Life, Living, People, Poetry, Quality of Life, Relationships, Self, Self Identity, Self Image, Society, Values, Whining, Wisdom

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel: The Bitch Next Door

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel

“I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself.” — D. H. Lawrence

(About a 19 minute read)

A strong woman with a singular passion in life
Once consented to become my neighbor.

Her spirit ran as simple and deep as a law of nature.
It was elegant in its simplicity, but ruling in its scope.

She was younger than me,
Younger than about half of us folks,
But she held herself truer,
Truer than most everyone does,
To her passion in life,
Her singular and sole passion in life,
Her one guiding star.

She loved and adored,
She cherished and adored,
She passionately adored,
Being a bitch.
Continue reading “A Flock of Sparrows for Majel: The Bitch Next Door”

Abuse, Agape, Alienation, Alienation From Self, Alison, Attachment, Authenticity, Being True To Yourself, Christianity, Evil, Happiness, Hope, Human Nature, Jana, Knowledge, Learning, Life, Living, Love, Lovers, Oppression, People, Poetry, Quality of Life, Relationships, Spiritual Alienation, Spirituality, Unconditional Love

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel: The Tragedy of Fool’s Gold

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel

(About an 8 minute read)

Jana was nearby,
For a decade, always nearby.
But I was not close to her.

She became my wife
And we shared a house.
We shared a bed.
We shared our bodies,
And we told each other
We shared our hearts and minds.

In truth, she was that spot on my back
That I never could see,
And that I never could reach
No matter how often,
And no matter how hard
I stared into the mirror,
And turning this way or that,
Tried to spot her.

Continue reading “A Flock of Sparrows for Majel: The Tragedy of Fool’s Gold”

Human Nature, Life, Living, Love, New Love, People, Poetry, Romantic Love, Terri

A Flock Sparrows for Majel: “When We Pivoted on Our Egos”

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel

(About an 8 minute read)

Do you remember now
That long ago dewy night
When we dissolved our proud walls in the Milky Way?
We were surprised to discover our hearts were twins.
And we began purring together like two cats cuddling.

We were strong and confident and nineteen.
We had returned for the summer from our universities,
And we lay, face to face, and eyes to eyes
On the hill behind your mother’s home.

Continue reading “A Flock Sparrows for Majel: “When We Pivoted on Our Egos””

Attached Love, Awe, Bad Ideas, Education, Erotic Love, Human Nature, Ideas, Knowledge, Learning, Love, Mature Love, New Love, Parental Love, Romantic Love, Science

Do the Sciences Rob Love of Beauty and Mystery?

“It is sometimes said that scientists are unromantic, that their passion to figure out robs the world of beauty and mystery … It does no harm to the romance of the sunset to know a little bit about it.” — Carl Sagan

SUMMARY: I reject the notion that the sciences rob love of beauty and mystery.

(About a 4 minute read)

Love is probably the best thing most of us will ever experience in life.  This fact is made even more astonishing when you consider that life also includes blogging, and yet love amazingly edges out blogging even in the minds of otherwise sensible people when it comes to the best things in life.

But what is love?

There seem upon examination to be so many kinds of love that it would be perfectly understandable if the question, “what is love”, made us all go off into a corner, suck our thumbs, and whimper.  At least, I think it would be perfectly understandable.  But then, going off into a corner, sucking my thumb, and whimpering is what I do with about a quarter of my day, especially after reading the news headlines.

Continue reading “Do the Sciences Rob Love of Beauty and Mystery?”

Alienation From Self, Aristotle, Authenticity, Being True To Yourself, Christianity, Cultural Traits, Culture, Ethics, Eudaimonia, Happiness, Human Nature, Ideas, Judaism, Life, Living, Memes, Morality, Morals, Pride, Purpose, Quality of Life, Religion, Religious Ideologies, Self Image, Self-Flourishing, Values, Well Being

Pride in Aristotle and Christianity

“The description of the proud or magnanimous man [in Aristotle’s Nichomachean Ethics] is very interesting as showing the difference between pagan and Christian ethics…”.  — Bertrand Russell.

SUMMARY:  Pride to Aristotle was a virtue, and a means to happiness, but to Christians, it is a sin, and a means to unhappiness.

(About a 7 minute read)

In Judaism, pride is called the root of all evil, a valuation that seems in part to have been carried over into Christianity, for Christians regard pride as the first and foremost of the Seven Deadly Sins.

In Catholicism, the Seven Deadly Sins are not to be confused with “Mortal Sins” — they do not automatically damn you to hell if you fail to repent of them before death, but they are pretty much bad enough anyway.

In contrast to the Jewish and Christian views, pride was an actual virtue to Aristotle.  Which of course, raises the question, “Why did Aristotle think pride was a virtue?”

Continue reading “Pride in Aristotle and Christianity”

Advice, Authenticity, Being True To Yourself, Courtship, Free Spirit, Freedom, Friends, Fun, Human Nature, Ideas, Life, Living, Love, Lovers, Loyalty, Marriage, Oppression, Play, Quality of Life, Relationships, Sex, Values

How an Open Relationship Can be Fun and Exciting for Both You and Your Mail Carrier

“If you love somebody, set them free.  If they return to you, it’s beautiful.” — Anonymous, often falsely attributed to Richard Bach.

SUMMARY:  Open relationships in which the partners are by and large free to do as they please aren’t all roses and sparkles, but they can solve some common enough problems with more conventional relationships.

(About a 7 minute read)

Give me a free spirited woman!  After more than twenty years of being happily celibate, I most certainly wouldn’t know what to do with one, but that does not mean I would not — if the right one came along — seriously consider getting into one of those romantic thingies with her.

You know, one of those friendships where you get to do sexy stuff like…um…I forget now.  Oh yeah!  Like blow up condoms and bounce them around the bedroom together!  At least, that’s what I recall condoms are for.  I’m pretty sure they make lousy garbage can liners, so it’s logically got to be balloons, right?

Continue reading “How an Open Relationship Can be Fun and Exciting for Both You and Your Mail Carrier”