Adolescent Sexuality, Agape, Anger, Authenticity, Being True To Yourself, Education, Erotic Love, Fear, Friends, Gratitude, Horniness, Human Nature, Infatuation, Learning, Life, Living, Love, Lovers, New Love, Passion, People, Possessiveness, Relationships, Romantic Love, Self, Self Identity, Self Image, Self-Flourishing, Self-Knowledge, Sexuality, Sharon, Talents and Skills, Teacher, Unconditional Love

Sharon’s Love for the Horny Misfit Boy

Many a beautiful friendship has sprouted from awkward soil.  In fact, most of my deepest friendships in life have begun clumsily.

I know of no inviolate law of nature that dictates the conservative beige panties of a young school librarian cannot possibly be the start of a profound bond between her and an insufferably horny 14 year old boy misfit.  I know of no law that states such a thing cannot happen.

Yet the very last thing on my mind when Sharon’s angry voice shook me awake that Spring morning was, “This is the start of a beautiful friendship”.

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Adolescent Sexuality, Courtship, Free Spirit, Hate, Horniness, Human Nature, Jealousy, Life, Love, Lovers, New Love, People, Relationships, Seduction, Sex, Sexuality

“We’ve Entered Our Dangerous Years, Paul”

Chris was one of the prettiest, most shapely beauties in our high school.  She was also one of the few in that category that I actually desired enough to want so much more than a casual friendship with.

You see, Chris was — like me — a bit of an outcast. We had the same bad reputation.  Folks said I had “quite a temper”, a “sharp tongue”, and that I was “contrary” — meaning that I tended to oppose things for no better reason than for the sake of opposing them.

Folks said exactly the same things about Chris.  She had quite a temper,  a sharp tongue, and — of course, being female, the word wasn’t “contrary” — Chris was a “bitch”.

Continue reading ““We’ve Entered Our Dangerous Years, Paul””

Aesthetics, Bad Ideas, Celibacy, Complaining, Cultural Change, Cultural Traits, Culture, Education, Erotic Love, Eudaimonia, Health, Horniness, Human Nature, Life, Living, Love, Lovers, Mental and Emotional Health, Pleasure, Quality of Life, Relationships, Self-Flourishing, Self-Pity, Sex, Sexuality, Shame, Society, Spirituality, The Art of Living Well, Values, Well Being, Whining

A Indelicate Post on the Most Delicate Topic of Simpatico Sex

(About a 5 minute read)

It has long been my personal, tender opinion that the pure Japanese genius for first seeing nearly everything as an aesthetic experience, and for then optimizing the aesthetics of those experiences — that the Japanese genius for that has only been defeated once — and once only — in the entire cultural history of that remarkable people.

The Japanese genius for aesthetics was overthrown when it took on sex.

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Advice, Bad Ideas, Buddhahood, Consciousness, Enlightenment, Human Nature, Life, Living, Love, Mysticism, Pride, Quality of Life, Satori, Self, Self-Integration, Spirituality, Wisdom

Is Abolishing the Ego a Bad Idea?

(About a 2 minute read)

Quite often, people tell me they want to attain nirvana, mosksha, kenshō, or enlightenment by abolishing their ego or “lower self”.  But I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.  At least not on the face of it.

I think I can see where they are coming from though.  In popular speech, the “ego” is synonymous with our pride.  Pride is quite often a source of foolishness, and can easily enough be seen as wholly unnecessary.  After all, pride isn’t exactly the same thing as self-esteem.  To many people “pride” is excessive or unjustified self-esteem.

But I see the ego as much bigger than pride — and much more important, too.  To me, the ego is the psychological self.  The self we think of as “me” or “I”.  In other words, I use the word in it’s original Latin sense.  Moreover, I do not believe pride can be abolished without abolishing the ego.

As I understand things, it is impossible to wholly abolish the ego.  I profoundly agree with Joseph Campbell that the powers within us we deny or repress do not wither and die.  Instead, they become our demons.

So, I think efforts to abolish the ego end up creating monsters.

Beyond that, the ego — or psychological self — strikes me as quite useful to us.  In fact, I can’t see anyone surviving for long without it.  Near as I can figure it, the ego is key to at least a dozen functions that are themselves both useful and vitally important to our survival.

I won’t go into them here other than to mention those functions include foresight, planning, self-defense, and many forms of motivation.  In sum, I do not believe it wise or beneficial to abolish the ego.  Or even try.  Instead, one’s objective should be to tame it through wisdom and/or love.

Arrogance, Competition, Friends, Human Nature, Intelligence, Judgementalism, Life, Loyalty, Self, Self Identity, Self Image, Self-Knowledge

The Death of an Arrogant King

EXECUTIVE SUMMARY: Paul describes the strategy he used to beat a far brighter and more favored boy in order to become his high school’s chess champion.

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THE CRITICS IGNITE! “In ‘Death of an Arrogant King’ de Hunne of blogging, Paul Sunstone professes himself to be a grandmaster of chess.  Shame! Shame!  In sincerity, he is ein Hun who has pushed boredom to new and astonishing levels.  He has made boredom a form of  barbarism. He has weaponized it.  An orderly society would crucify Sunstone.  Crucify de Hunne just as he himself shamelessly crucifies human decency in the process of excreting his innumerable boring posts upon the world.” — Johanna Meyer, Der Blogkritiker, “Die Fussen-Welt”, Fussen, Germany.

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Human Nature, Life, Living, Love, Lovers, Poetry, Relationships, Self-Knowledge

A Flock of Sparrows For Majel: The Cold March Rain

A Flock of Sparrows for Majel

The March rain falls on my cottage cold tonight,
Falls on the roof and drips from the eaves
Like the sad tears of sad gods.

You are this evening up in Manitou among mountains
In the apartment you love, the apartment whose walls
Are not trued to a square.

I want to speak honest my love for you
But I hear her scornful voice in my head,
“That’s stupid, Paul, that’s TMI.”

You don’t know her, not even her name.
She was gone before you came.

But we still fight, she and I, we still fight.
She condemns my every feeling, my every truth.
I have to watch I don’t think she is you.

She’s the smoke that hides from me your fire.
She’s the distance between our hearts and minds.
She’s the ghost that haunts our love.
And she was even gone before you came.

Advice, Alienation, Alienation From Self, Andrea Dinardo, Authenticity, Being True To Yourself, Butch, Carla, Critiques, Eudaimonia, Free Spirit, Freedom, Happiness, Human Nature, Humor, Ideas, Life, Literature, Living, Love, Oppression, Outstanding Bloggers, Quality of Life, Rae, Self, Self-determination, Self-Flourishing, Society, Spiritual Alienation, Spirituality, The Art of Living Well, Truth, Values, Well Being

“Even Cowgirls Get the Blues” by Tom Robbins

(About a 4 minute read)

Long term, loyal readers of my blog might nod their heads in enthusiastic agreement when I say now that “I am a man of passions”.

Most likely, they won’t nod at all, but there’s always the hope one or two might.

(I’m…um…For enthusiastic head nodding, I’m pretty much depending on you, Carla and Andrea!  Chocolates? Gum? Fabled Portuguese Talking Turtles? Quality Balinese Donkey Porn?  I’m not above shameless bribery, you know.)

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