(About a 2 minute read)
While I am absolutely certain that I have never met this person, he is equally certain he has met my penis.
I know he believes he has met my penis because he is not satisfied with it. It is too short for him. Sometimes it is even too thin for him. But it is never just right. So, at any hour of the day or night, I am very likely to get an email from him insisting that I add “up to three inches” to my penis. Insisting that I do so. Demanding it, in fact. It is as if the only thing keeping him alive is his demented goal of vastly improving my penis.
I have thought of writing back to the deranged idiot telling him that if I wanted to vastly improve my penis I would tattoo a bold racing stripe down the side of it — or better yet, a lightening bolt — but that I am quite satisfied with its size, and perhaps he should get a life. But I have learned in my 50 years to never argue with idiots. It only brings out the worse in them, and I most assuredly do not want to see this particular idiot at his very worse.
I know I am not the only one he is concerned about. I have heard others complain that they too are the target of this demented fool’s obsession with their penises. So, my real question is, “Who is encouraging him?” “Who is responding to him often enough that he is ever hopeful someone else will also buy his penis growth product?” And I can only imagine one group of people who are characteristically so naive, so stupid, and so gullible that they would respond to this guy’s emails: Bimbo Talk Show Hosts.
Yes, it must be those Bimbo Talk Show Hosts. Who else is stupid enough to buy his product? Only the Administration comes close and even the Administration is smarter than the world’s Bimbo Talk Show Hosts. The Administration would never compensate for their very small neocon penises by buying his scam growth product. Instead, they would compensate by invading a country or two. But Bimbo Talk Show Hosts — that’s another matter. They are so gullible I bet even the female Bimbo Talk Show Hosts have bought his product. Surely, Ann Coulter has. Worse, she is probably disappointed she hasn’t seen any results yet.